Merry Christmas

This will mark the third Christmas I have been aboard this blogging ship. It's been rough at times and lacking updates but I'm trying. I hope you are doing well. Thank you for reading and I look forward to updating you on this new chapter.

Thank you.

Happy holidays.

Breaks over time to do what I do (LA Auto Show Press Days 2011)

Taking a break and getting back into it-

It IS okay (at least in my eyes) to take a break.

On my flight coming home to Tennessee I drew intently in my sketchbook that I carry with me, doing side views of cars and playing with my colored pencils and how the lines would melt just enough with my markers when I would smear it over my drawings. The effect it created was really cool and I had been shown this technique by friends and instructors, but I knew that (as is the case many times when I fly back to my parents) my sketch time would be incredibly limited, if available at all, while I was back in TN.

    Not because I didn't want to while I was there, but because there is so much that needs to be done when I get back. My parents are incredibly busy folk and this year it seems that everything has been concentrated into a twelve month period. January through now has seen so much change by way of my grandmother who lives with my parents, and has Alzheimer's. Her disease has progressed to the point that no amount of literature that my mother reads or actions we take for her to retain memory can prepare us for what will probably happen over the next 6 months. Her brain has removed the stately, classy woman who golfed everyday but Sunday, traveled to Maui, Hawaii for her anniversary for my late grandfather every year and just lived. Today we are left with a shell of a woman who we fight to feed 3 meals a day to. She sits idly by the window in our living room at the end of our ranch-style home, across the room the television playing the days news which we all know she could care less about but it provides some sort of background noise for the slow and sometimes painful process of the disease that is ending the synapses in her brain. No longer do I become emotional as I once did over this disease, mostly because I had my moment following last christmas and new years break. I allowed myself to accept that she is no longer my Mamaw, because her demeanor and daily routine are not what I grew up knowing. She is a woman that I know and try to take care of as much as I can when I am in town now. My Mamaw left not too long after my Papaw passed in 2007. I can't blame her, because the affect that he had on her also pushed me to take this challenge of California and school on. When he left, I know she wanted to go with him. When he left, I knew that I should stop accepting the sub-standard life that I had placed myself in, and realize that only hard work and passion for a future will be what carries me forward. Everything in my eyes does happen for a reason, but the balance you have to place on that still exists.

I feel that I had to bring that subject up because it was at the forefront of this trip, my mother realizing what I had realized last christmas, only now. Watching my mother lose her own mother is extremely difficult.

While I have been home, I decided to return back to working at the Honda dealer I had worked at before, because the management team is amazing and through this process, has kept me employed with them. I have been so tempted to endorse them on this blog, but I don't know if they would want my endorsement (LOL) nor do I want to add too many names on this blog, because I know this is the internet and personal information is important to many people. I will say though, that I am sure you can find some pictures on this blog that show who this dealership is. I have to say its the most amazing team of people I have ever come across and I love them like they are my family. Flaws and all.

I bring the work up because I learned a life lesson this week. That is patience with others, and understanding situations deeper than face value. When I come in town, I do my best to be the jack of all trades guy. I enjoy greatly leaving my mark on the place by way of remaining in the background and providing change on a small scale. I know that details can oftentimes matter and taking the extra step to check inventory and make it look good can always look good in the customers eyes.

I think that I worry sometimes that if this California experience fails. I have the dealership to pad my fall. It is almost like, this can be too perfect. It feels too right and I fear the 'too good to be true' moniker. With my acceptance letter, I feel like I can soon accept to leave that part of my life behind (not the people though) and move forward once and for all.

The last little bit of news is the most exciting! The Los Angeles Auto Show press days are this week (16-17) and I LITERALLY am chomping at the bit to be there already. There will be an offensive amount of pictures posted here so brace yourselves.

BNA to LAX this evening.